The adoption of a child is an exciting, joy-filled moment for a family. However, welcoming adopted children into a family can present unique challenges that must be addressed with patience and education.

Dr. Karyn Purvis (2007) the author of “The Connected Child: Bring Hope and Healing to your Adoptive family”, explains that many of these children who are internationally adopted are suffering from a form of sensory overload. Traditional forms of discipline are ineffective and sometimes compound the problem resulting in out-of-control children and out-of-their-mind parents.

Known in some circles as “The Child Whisperer”, Karyn has the unique ability to foster trust and a sense of calm within troubled children. A former foster parent and mother of three, Karyn has turned this gift into a summer camp called “The Hope Connection” – an outdoor reprieve for adopted children who are at risk of becoming institutionalized because of severe behavioral problems.

Karyn is the department head for TCU’s Institute for Child Development. In a recent article featuring TCU’s work, Karyn says, “We want to understand why children who suffer severe abuse and neglect in their early years have so much trouble developing normally and we believe we’re making good headway.”

She goes on to say, “Our work has confirmed that these children’s aggressive behaviors are fear based. We see the fear, the mental illness and anger disappear when we give them tools, such as words instead of physical violence and anger, to deal with the pain and fear. We think the greatest thing we can do is create an environment where they feel safe.” (www.magazine.tcu.edu/articles/2006-01-cv.asp)

In her book, Karyn and her two colleagues provide insights into solving the puzzle of difficult behavior, teaching life values, and incorporating discipline in a nurturing way. Her methods have garnered national attention. In 2006, NBC’s Dateline produced a story titled “Fighting for Dane and other troubled kids”. The producer of this episode writes the following:

“I watched in awe as Karyn firmly, but calmly pulled the raging child into her lap, cradling and rocking her and speaking to her in soft, soothing tones. With equal doses of patience, love, and leadership, she brought the child to an emotional landing where she felt enough safety and comfort to relax and let go of the rage. The 30-minute ordeal ended with the child sobbing and melting into Karyn’s snuggling arms. I will never forget the scene of the two of them walking away, hand-in-hand in search of gum. Much later, Karyn determined that the child had suffered a flashback to her own baby’s sister’s drowning after seeing another child at camp who reminded her of her sister.” (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/13327640)

It is important to note that not all adopted children suffer from Sensory Integration issues. However, parents can feel more empowered knowing that resources are available to assist in the fine art of loving a child who has never been loved and nurturing a child who has never been held. With patience and understanding, these children can slowly adapt to their new environment and enjoy the kisses, hugs, and snuggles their parents so desperately want to give.